anxious
menopause in your 30s isn’t the business. i didn’t realize how much of a filter i had until i was put on menopause medication to protect my fertility during these treatments. what am i anxious about? although i love my family who is supporting me, i am anxious in getting my life and independence back!

“don’t forget to love the way you want to be loved, listen the way you want to be heard, speak the way you want to be spoken to, give the way you hope others will give, care the way you want others to care because change doesn’t start with them. it starts right here.”

tommy boy
tomorrow is the international day of happiness, and what better movie to highlight than a chris farley movie. tommy boy is my favorite movie of his, and probably top 5 all time favorites. for those who do not know this movie, it is about a goofy, recent (almost failed) college graduate who takes on the responsibility of keeping his late father’s auto parts factory from going bankrupt. with fellow classmate and co-worker, richard (played by david spade), they go on a quest to sell sell sell. phenomenal cast includes bo derek, rob lowe, dan aykroyd, and more. you can stream this on prime video, apple tv, and more!

@she_saidyes instagram
everytime i go on this account, i get lost in the amazingly, happy, positive wedding and engagement moments that just makes me ugly cry tears of joy. in honor of international day of happiness, go follow this happy account.

bam bam by camila cabello feat. ed sheeran
what gets me out of a funk is dancing, and this tune by camila cabello makes me salsa my way out of a bad mood. i also love that this song is about how people change and that’s just life baby.

lagunitas hi-fi cannabis beverage
talk about happy, whenever i drink this beverage, it gives me that stereotypical high that you see in the movies where you just giggle at everything, and i love it. unlike other cannabis beverages, this one actually tastes good, while the others tastes like your ingesting a tonic or flower water. also, it comes in various doses and not the 100-mg-smack-you-in-your-face dose. if you have never dabbled in cannabis beverages, start with the 2mg cbd : 2mg thc drink.

cosmedix opticrystal eye serum
my biggest skincare problems include acne (yes, even in my 30s) and dry under eyes. i dont know what it is but my under eyes/orbital bone are always so dry, unless i face slug with aquaphor. this little guy is crazy expensive, but i promise you, it is so so so worth it if you have the same problem as me. a little goes a long way and it lasts for a long while.

coffee dose merch
kinda random that i am featuring a local orange county coffee shop’s merch, but tomorrow is the international day of happiness, and nothing makes me happier than a cute coffee shop with cute merch. this crude, unapologetically authentic coffee store serves their beverages in to-go cups with raunchy or aggressively funny sayings, and sells merch with the same graphics, but rotates often. my smiley sweatshirt featured on this post says “don’t be an asshole.” their branding is not for the faint of heart.

medical update
no new medical updates to share. very fortunate that i do not have any additional side effects as the days go on. prepping for my mri on thursday, which will determine if i need another infusion or not.

what’s great about the i-spy clinical trial is that the treatments are tailored to how you personally respond to the medicine. it’s not like chemo where you have to do X-amount of treatments over the course of x-amount of weeks. for example: if the mass fully melts away in 1 treatment, i will only have to do 1 infusion. if it doesn’t melt away in 4 treatments, then i have to move on to another medicine or start a hybrid version of the standard chemotherapy.

stay tuned for the mri results on friday (or the latest monday!)